Wednesday, September 24, 2008

TCU - OU Preview; the Mascots

Due to overwhelming popular request, I submit to you a breakdown of the mascots:

First of all, in Texas the Horned Frog is actually a lizard. Horned frogs do exist, however (link NSFW). The Texas Horned Lizard is being monitored by the Texas Parks and Wildlife commission as the THL population has been dwindling over the past 30 yards. Apparently one of the theories surrounding the demise of the Horned Frog has been red ants. TP&W even has a program to "watch" the THL. If you want to read way too much information about the THL, click here.For those of you with young 'uns at home, you can even make your own.

Sooners, on the other hand, are thriving. Cheating continues to thrive in our society 120 years after the first Sooner. See Enron, Martha Stewart, Worldcom, New England Patriots, Notre Dame laptop scandals, Lehman Brothers, any election in Chicago ever.

As it relates to college football, while the Sooners may have been a pioneer in cheating and illegal acts for the student-athlete, the proliferation of domestic abuse, drug trafficking, kidnapping and your basic DUI has taken on a life of its own. In 1989, Charles Thompson made the cover of Sports Illustrated sporting an orange jumpsuit. Fast forward 18 years, and practically every member of the Texas Longhorns was wearing an orange jumpsuit, and not just because it was school colors. Today, for good or bad, an athlete with legal troubles is almost commonplace. In spite of this man's valiant efforts, Jimmy John's is still better known for fabulous sandwiches and not for on campus cocaine distribution. Ellis T Jones III is lesser known as well.

Clearly the Sooner is a superior mascot, as their ilk has thrived in the past 30 years, defying police and the NC2A, while the Texas Horned Lizard is requiring bleeding heart liberal tree huggers to protect their mere existence. Advantage: Sooners

1 comment:

Red Dawg said...

I can't get enough Horned Lizard talk.