I was going to do an indepth analysis of the LSU Bama game today, since I have friends that have or are attending both schools and both are led by people suspected to be the antichrist.
In lieu of actually spending time doing that, I link to this, some beautfiul work by the folks at everydayshouldbesaturyday.com and rockytoptalk.com.
Enjoy.
Friday, November 2, 2007
Thursday, November 1, 2007
Signs of the Apocalypse
Kansas is a NINETEEN POINT FAVORITE against the Nebraska Bugeaters on Saturday. About the only series more lopsided than NU-KU over the last 40 years or so is Navy and Notre Dame. Anyway, I'm still stunned by that. In wondering what has gone wrong with the Husker defense, I came across this photo from the Mizzou game, and realized the problem.
In this photo, Bugeater LB Lance Brandenburgh demonstrates the scrotum tear tackle technique that was perfected earlier this year by Allen Beckett while visiting Henry Hudson's pub. Unfortunately for Brandenburgh, he did not properly execute the tackle and Chase Daniel and his teammates had their way with the Husker D.
It's my honest opinion that if the Bugeaters can successfully execute just one scrotum tackle early in the game against the Jayhawks, they could really control the ball, limit the number of touches for the Jayhawk offense, and take advantage of Kansas.
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Basketball Season
Tonight the men's team opens the exhibition season against Rockhurst University, a D-II school in the KC area. I've been having too much fun following the Sooners and making fun of the Aggies (TX and OK) and the Bugeaters to be up to date on the hoops teams yet. It was just a few years ago when the annual beating by Texas in early October would turn my attention to basketball, but a resurgence in the football program has left me with tabling my hoops interest until a later time.
On a related matter, I do know that Alexander Graham Bell got an assistant coach fired at IU earlier this week. Earlier this week the Hoosiers approached Ahmed Khalil, a police officer in Fallujah, about filling the vacated position. Khalil rejected the offer, however, citing the poor job security provided by Sampson and the Hoosiers.
On a related matter, I do know that Alexander Graham Bell got an assistant coach fired at IU earlier this week. Earlier this week the Hoosiers approached Ahmed Khalil, a police officer in Fallujah, about filling the vacated position. Khalil rejected the offer, however, citing the poor job security provided by Sampson and the Hoosiers.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
My open letter to Texas Aggie fans
Dear Aggie Fan,
All the buzz is that you're going to get rid of coach Fran. Leading candidate according to the internets and such are Tommy Tuberville of Auburn and Jeff Tedford of California. Let's look at the resumes. I'll type slow so you can follow along.
Tommy Tuberville is such a well respected coach that his present university loves so much they flew Bobby Petrino in to meet with them before they officially fired Tuberville. Coming into this year, he's 71-29 in 8 years at Auburn, so he's averaged 9 wins and 3-4 losses. Throw out his 13-0 year in 2004, and he's a smooth 58-29. He's 19-16 against top 25 teams. He coaches Auburn, and the Tigers are always looking up at big brother Alabama in the state.
Jeff Tedford is 43-20 at Cal in five years. That's an average of 8-4. I know all you Aggies believe the academics at Cal and TAMU are similar, but I have two words for you. Kevin Murray. If those two words aren't enough, here are two more. Jamar Toombs. I don't know if I spelled it right, and am not taking the time to look it up. This ain't the NY times. Not that they'd look it up either. Anyway, where was I? So, Tedford is 8-8 against top 25 teams. Cal is at best the second highest profile team in the state. He'd fit right in.
This is not a plea to keep Coach Fran (as appealing as it may be for me as a Sooner alum) but I'm just asking you kids to consider who you're replacing him with. The two "leading candidates" per the computers and such are masters at the 8-4 record. Gary Gibbs can get you that. And your players will stay out of jail. And he's probably cheaper. My point is you ran RC off for going 8-4, give or take a game. Berry Tramel once wrote in the Oklahoman in 1998 that they fired Gary Gibbs for going 8-4, and they'd name the stadium after the next coach that could get them to that. Maybe that's all your shooting for. Or maybe the 500 record against top 25 teams is appealing when the current coach was 3-14 against ranked foes at the start of the year.
You gotta figger out if you want Aggie blood. Or not. But you've got to hire someone that has positive relationships with the Texas h.s. coaches, and isn't a snake. Fran's midnight ride out of Tuscaloosa, and the way he stiffed those players, soured many a coach on him, IMO. For that reason, or karma if you believe in it, he was doomed from the start.
So, here's my four point plan for building your team back to its normal luster, which means 8-3 or 9-3 and losing a bowl game. It might even turn out better than that if you're fortunate.
1) Hire Major Applewhite as your head coach. Sure, some of your fans have underwear stains older than him, but by all accounts, he's an up and comer. You won't have to pay him $2 million a year to coach, since you'll be paying Fran $2.0 million per year not to coach. You'll be taking the high road and joining forces with a former Longhorn, endearing yourself to the Texas h.s. coaches, and getting a good offensive mind. You also might really make some Longhorns mad, and that's always worth a few laughs as well. Hey, former Sooner great Darrell Royal jumped ship and coached the dreaded Horns for a few years. Since his name's on the stadium and all, I think that turned out okay. He didn't even have to pay money for it.
2) Hire John Blake as your recruiter. For all his warts, that man can bring in some talent. You just want someone else to coach it.
3) Hire Phil Bennett as your defensive coordinator. Phil's a class dude, and has proven to be a good defensive coordinator. He's a former Aggie that got thrown under the bus by RC if memory serves me correctly. For all we know, he could be a head coach too. It's tough to tell from the Hilltop.
4) Make Stephen McGee a slot receiver. Get a QB that's a running threat and run some sort of spread alternating Lane and Goodson as your backs. You might even think about using a tricky formation called "The I" and handing the ball to Goodson and Lane about 35-40 times a game.
The one variable to my plan is that Bennett was on Blake's staff for a year at OU. I don't know what they're relationship is. I know both were unemployed at the end of the year.
You can pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for advise like this, but here at landthieves, I'm giving it to you free.
All the buzz is that you're going to get rid of coach Fran. Leading candidate according to the internets and such are Tommy Tuberville of Auburn and Jeff Tedford of California. Let's look at the resumes. I'll type slow so you can follow along.
Tommy Tuberville is such a well respected coach that his present university loves so much they flew Bobby Petrino in to meet with them before they officially fired Tuberville. Coming into this year, he's 71-29 in 8 years at Auburn, so he's averaged 9 wins and 3-4 losses. Throw out his 13-0 year in 2004, and he's a smooth 58-29. He's 19-16 against top 25 teams. He coaches Auburn, and the Tigers are always looking up at big brother Alabama in the state.
Jeff Tedford is 43-20 at Cal in five years. That's an average of 8-4. I know all you Aggies believe the academics at Cal and TAMU are similar, but I have two words for you. Kevin Murray. If those two words aren't enough, here are two more. Jamar Toombs. I don't know if I spelled it right, and am not taking the time to look it up. This ain't the NY times. Not that they'd look it up either. Anyway, where was I? So, Tedford is 8-8 against top 25 teams. Cal is at best the second highest profile team in the state. He'd fit right in.
This is not a plea to keep Coach Fran (as appealing as it may be for me as a Sooner alum) but I'm just asking you kids to consider who you're replacing him with. The two "leading candidates" per the computers and such are masters at the 8-4 record. Gary Gibbs can get you that. And your players will stay out of jail. And he's probably cheaper. My point is you ran RC off for going 8-4, give or take a game. Berry Tramel once wrote in the Oklahoman in 1998 that they fired Gary Gibbs for going 8-4, and they'd name the stadium after the next coach that could get them to that. Maybe that's all your shooting for. Or maybe the 500 record against top 25 teams is appealing when the current coach was 3-14 against ranked foes at the start of the year.
You gotta figger out if you want Aggie blood. Or not. But you've got to hire someone that has positive relationships with the Texas h.s. coaches, and isn't a snake. Fran's midnight ride out of Tuscaloosa, and the way he stiffed those players, soured many a coach on him, IMO. For that reason, or karma if you believe in it, he was doomed from the start.
So, here's my four point plan for building your team back to its normal luster, which means 8-3 or 9-3 and losing a bowl game. It might even turn out better than that if you're fortunate.
1) Hire Major Applewhite as your head coach. Sure, some of your fans have underwear stains older than him, but by all accounts, he's an up and comer. You won't have to pay him $2 million a year to coach, since you'll be paying Fran $2.0 million per year not to coach. You'll be taking the high road and joining forces with a former Longhorn, endearing yourself to the Texas h.s. coaches, and getting a good offensive mind. You also might really make some Longhorns mad, and that's always worth a few laughs as well. Hey, former Sooner great Darrell Royal jumped ship and coached the dreaded Horns for a few years. Since his name's on the stadium and all, I think that turned out okay. He didn't even have to pay money for it.
2) Hire John Blake as your recruiter. For all his warts, that man can bring in some talent. You just want someone else to coach it.
3) Hire Phil Bennett as your defensive coordinator. Phil's a class dude, and has proven to be a good defensive coordinator. He's a former Aggie that got thrown under the bus by RC if memory serves me correctly. For all we know, he could be a head coach too. It's tough to tell from the Hilltop.
4) Make Stephen McGee a slot receiver. Get a QB that's a running threat and run some sort of spread alternating Lane and Goodson as your backs. You might even think about using a tricky formation called "The I" and handing the ball to Goodson and Lane about 35-40 times a game.
The one variable to my plan is that Bennett was on Blake's staff for a year at OU. I don't know what they're relationship is. I know both were unemployed at the end of the year.
You can pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for advise like this, but here at landthieves, I'm giving it to you free.
Osborne Explains Walk Off Program to Callahan
"You see, we used to have a program where kids that wanted to be here walked on, and we didn't have to pay them a scholarship. For you, we are starting a "walk off" program. It's for grown ups that we don't want around anymore, and we have to pay them to walk off. Your the first one of these, so you're kind of a pioneer. Congratulations, and tell Steve Pederson Happy Halloween for me."
Monday, October 29, 2007
Landthieves Poll #4
This week's LandThieves poll follows. I'm working on a few revisions to the math, but work and family are getting in the way of finalizing that. Enough about me, on to the poll...
- Boston College - BC leap frogs Ohio St this week for #1. BC opponents SOS improved considerably this week; that's part playing Va Tech, part their past opponents winning. This week BC hosts the 'Noles, who many pundits keep expecting to break out of their funk sometime this year. These same pundits still expect Kathleen Turner to make another racy murder thriller, because of a scene in Body Heat. That movie was 26 freaking years ago, people! Let' s move on. BC will win again.
- Ohio State - Ohio State continues it's roll against the mediocrity that is the Big 10. Wisconsin is 7-2. They are 1-2 on the road, with a victory against...UNLV. They lost by 31 to Penn St, who proved to be beatable at home by Ohio State.
- Kansas - I haven't seen that much velour on a human being since...I give up. Kansas proves they are for real by winning at A&M. This also means they are better than the previous teams that couldn't win at College Station this year...Montana State; Fresno State; Louisiana-Monroe; Baylor; Oklahoma State.
- Arizona State - with each passing week, it's getting tougher and tougher for Dirk Koetter to stump for a new head coaching job. The Sun Devils rally from a double digit deficit to hand Cal it's third straight loss. ASU finishes the year with at Oregon, at UCLA, hosting USC and hosting intrastate rival Arizona.
- Oregon - the Ducks host the Sun Devils this weekend, so the 4 or 5 team is dropping in the coming week. Oregon finishes with ASU, Arizona, UCLA and intrastate rival Oregon State.
- West Virginia -WVU beat up on Rutgers this weekend. When Pat White stays healthy, they are a tough team.
- LSU - Les Miles travels to Tuscaloosa to battle his predecessor at LSU, Nick Saban. Oddly enough, there is an egomaniac convention in Tuscaloosa that weekend. Coincidence? I think not.
- Oklahoma -Sooners were originally slated to play Boone State this weekend, but TV powers changed the game to Thanksgiving weekend. This provides time for the Cowboys to lose a couple more games and declare the Sooner game a "bowl game".
- Michigan - Michigan has had two road games so far this year. They travel to Michigan State and Wisconsin the next two weeks.
- South Florida - USF loses to UConn this week. But USF is clearly the better team. Why? because that's what my poll says.
- Georgia - Georgia wins a huge rivalry game against the Gators. I expected the Dawgs to fold the tent after the Vol loss, but Saturday's win was a big one, even though Tebow had one hand tied behind his back.
- Connecticut - I don't care what my computer says, I can't take this team seriously. They're just trying to build a football team the women's hoops team would be proud of.
- Rutgers
- Northern Iowa - narrow victory against Youngstown State this weekend keeps the top 20 ranking alive for the Panthers.
- Florida - Tim Tebow is best one armed QB in the country.
- Auburn
- Clemson
- Alabama - battles for lead in SEC West is in Tuscaloosa this weekend.
- Missouri
- Virginia Tech
- Virginia - now with losses to national powers Wyoming and NC State
- Wake Forest
- Purdue
- Texas - Longhorns finally overtake UMass.
- South Carolina
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Mangino Announces new Clothing Line
Kansas Jayhawk football coach Mark Mangino took the opportunity of national exposure at the TAMU-Jayhawk football game to announce his new casual wear clothing line. In this exclusive interview with Sooner alum Stacey Dales, Coach Mangino sports a sleek look in the Jayhawk velour track suit. The suit is available to all Kansas fans, and comes in several sizes, including plus sizes Jumbo, Husky, and Look Out! It's coming this way!
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