Griffin to Return to Norman

by Rhett Bomar, Automotive Industry Reporter


Blake Griffin shocked Oklahoma Sooner fans today by announcing he would return to the Sooners for his junior year. Griffin did not hold a press conference, but issued a statement through the athletic department. Many were surprised by the move. Coach Jeff Capel said, "I'm as shocked as anyone. Blake was projected to be a top five pick in the NBA draft. He's going to earn millions of dollars in the NBA. But I'm thrilled he's returning."


In a move that many has many Big 12 fans crying foul, the Obama administration announced this afternoon that Tommy Griffin has been named CEO of General Motors. Rumors abound that OU President David Boren used his political connections in the Democratic Party to strong arm the administration into this appointment. Griffin will be able to telecommute from the Marc Heitz Auto Dealership near the Miracle Mile in Norman, Oklahoma. Obama's staff praised the move, "Griffin is a visionary. He's very sure of himself. You have to be to if you're African American and dye your hair red. He's never lost $10 billion dollars before. We think his fresh ideas and leadership will launch GM into uncharted territory."

Kansas State coach Frank Martin was appalled. I've never seen such blatant tactics in keeping compelling a student-athlete to stay at school. Plus, I wish we would have though of this for Michael Beasley. We coulda made him CEO of Boeing."