The Newfound Horns Rushing Attack

Much ado this week about Texas being better because they have a run game now. Well, it's better than last year, but let's take a quick look:

In four games, Texas has averaged 4.55 yards per attempt. Someone will tell you they have the 25 best rushing attack in the country. That's true, if you count yards per game. However, what's really going on is the Horns are rushing more. They have the 13th most rushing attempts. The average per carry only ranks 37th.

Finally, here are the rankings of the four Horns foes in terms of yards per carry allowed:
Rice 117, BYU 92, UCLA 110, Iowa State 51. The most telling part of this: in only one of the four games (UCLA) was the Longhorn yards per carry greater than what the team has allowed in their other contests.

Rice gave up 4.77 yards per carry, and gives up 6.1 yards to everyone else.
BYU gave up 3.86 ypc against Texas, and 4.86 to everyone else
UCLA: 5.68 vs 5.01
Iowa State: 3.62 to the Horns, 3.73 to others.

Overall, the 4.55 yards per carry for the Horns compares unfavorably with the 4.95 yards per carry that the other opponents of the Horns foes have gained. So, Malcolm Brown is better than the Greg Davis coached RB by committee, let's not confuse them with Georgia Tech or Wisconsin.

Muschamp to Florida - Ten Things I think you think I think

Thoughts on the Demise of the Texas coaching staff

1. Bob Stoops remains at Oklahoma. Some websites had again claimed Stoops was headed to Gainesville. I really wish Florida would achieve some stability at the Head Coach position. Every time this scenario comes up, I get nervous.
2. Dec 11 will now be a holiday in Oklahoma. Coach Boom, we wish you the best in the SEC.
3. Unless Bob Davie starts doing ESPN-SEC games, he'll have fewer opportunities to mispronounce Muschamp's name.
4. I think Mack will be hard pressed to replace Muschamp with the same caliber of assistant. Coach Boom was clearly one of the best d-coordinators out there. Will he hire the next Duane Akina? Or the next Gene Chizik?
5. One rumor persists that Texas will promote Major Applewhite to Offensive Coordinator. Next year, they will hire Chris Simms as Co-Offensive Coordinator.
6. ESPN and the University of Texas announced that they will now launch the Longhorn Classic Network, and will only show replays of games from 1998-2009, and the Darrell Royal era.
7. Seriously, if Applewhite follows Muschamp to Gainesville, which recent reports refute, the staff is in a high level of disarray. They've lost their assistant head coach, the defensive coordinator and offensive coordinator in one offseason.
8. Jim Jeffcoat resigned from Houston last week. I have to believe that he will land in Austin to be d-line coach there. On the other hand, as the Steve Campbell's article mentions, UH wasn't exactly known for it's defensive prowess while JJ was coaching the Coug's d-line.
9. Some published reports indicated Bama OC Jim McElwain will interview for the Texas job. Unless he's going to get the coach in waiting gig, that's totally a lateral move, into a peer from a program perspective, but a conference that has less prestige and less respectability. As a result, I'm skeptical. 
10. Luther Campbell says on Twitter that Randy Shannon will be the next DC and Coach in waiting. He does not cite a source. Uncle Luke did not indicate whether he was bringing the bounty system to Austin. According to Wikipedia, Uncle Luke did marry a Dallas lawyer a couple of years back, so there are some Texas ties...
11. I don't think the coach in waiting is a good thing. You can argue that you have ton have succession planning in an organization, but it generally is not published. A coach in waiting just gets people focused on the head coach's departure. When adversity presents itself to an organization, the distraction gets bigger. Fiefdoms split and reassemble, and more energy is expended on who's in charge next than the organizational priorities at hand.
12. I really don't wish to watch Texas go down the tubes. Rivalries are best when both rivals are playing at a high level. think Navratilova-Everett, Oklahoma-Nebraska from the 80s, Miami-FL-Florida State in the 90s, Cowboys-Steelers from the 70s, Yankees-Red Sox of late. The excitement, and exposure, gets turned up a notch when there's more at stake than just bragging rights. No one's clamoring to watch reruns of those Mackovic-Blake match ups from the mid-to-late 90s.

Finally, I'd like to apologize for not breaking this top ten list out between Leaders and Legends.

Texas QB Nicknames

A few years ago, when we were starting this blog, we came up with the nickname "My Little Pony" for Colt McCoy. Yesterday, while driving back from Austin, I had an idea for Garreett Gilbert.s nickname.

He will heretofore be known as G Spot.

Longhorn Network Programming Suggestions

During the WTF Media Days, I was very busy. However, I was able to sit down with Mack Brown and DeLoss Dodd's and discuss some programming content for the often rumored Longhorn TV network. I haven't had a chance to post since, but here are some suggestions that they didn't care for that much:

• Failure to Launch: WTF correspondents debate whether the title is a Matthew McCaughnahey film or the title of Greg Davis' playbook.
• Dazed and Confused: 24/7 reality show featuring Vince Young and a playbook.
• A Time to Kill: an inside look on the negotiations that led to the demise of the big 12 as we know it.
• Boys on the Side: the story of Longhorn women's basketball team.
• Fools Gold: the pro basketball prospects of PJ Tucker.
• Austin's dumbest criminals, presented by The Smoking Gun. Follow the hijinks of the Longhorn football team through voluntary workouts.
• Dude, where's my clothes? An epic documentary in search of Edwin Simmons' belongings.
• Great Expectations: interviews with Longhorn gridiron stars who explain what it's like to to be a perpetual favorites to win the conference but only have three conference titles in 14 years.
• Replay, sponsored by Gatorade. Reuniting the Chris Simms-Roy Williams connection to see if they can ever score a TD against the Sooner D.
• NCIS: Austin. Abby joins the Longhorn network with her lab gear. She goes in search of untainted urine samples from Lance Armstrong and Roger Clemens.
• Extreme Makeover. Cosmetic dentists try to remove the coffee stains from Mack Brown's teeth.
• Draft redux. Joint programming with the NFL Network where experts debate which round Longhorn first round draft picks would be selected in hindsight.

Got other ideas? Let's see them in the comments.

Lebron to Play QB for Longhorns

By Austin/Cleveland insider Chris Mihm

Cleveland (LTP) - In an exclusive interview with someone claiming to be in the inner circle of LeBron James, Landthieves has learned that the sought after free agent will forego his lucrative basketball career to pursue a football career with the Texas Longhorns.


According to the unnamed source, "Lebron saw during the Big 12 shakedown how powerful the Longhorns were. Everyone wants to suck on the ample teats of the Texas Longhorns Football Program. Plus, they have a rich tradition of professional football players. People like Mike Williams, Roy Williams and Ricky Williams. He wants to do for the James surname what those gentleman have done for the Williams surname. This can do nothing but expand LeBron's global brand."


LeBron is looking to expand his reach into football, cycling and movies with this decision. According to multiple sources, representatives from LeBron's circle have already started discussions with Matthew McConaughey's movie production company where LeBron will play the lead role in a biopic of Austin resident Lance Armstrong. Movie insiders believe the film is titled, "One Ball is enough for Me". Filming is to start immediately.


LeBron - who will walk on and play quarterback for the Horns - would miss the voluntary workouts this summer, but many believe he will easily transition from the simple offensive sets of Mike Brown to the simple offensive sets of Greg Davis.

Mack Brown could not be reached for comment, as he was busy preparing for LeBron's arrival in Austin later this week. In other words, he was searching for the ipod that Vince Young gave him.

Longhorns need Chaffeurs

I think now we can safely say that AlcoholEdu is not working for the Texas football team. According to this handy website, 72% of UT students consumed alcohol in the past 30 days; 69% had at least one sexual partner in the past year, and 19% regularly skip breakfast. I have no idea why the last stat is in there? I think those 19% don't need food in their stomachs to absorb alcohol? Do they skip breakfast because they're trying to get back to their place and get their textbooks for today's classes? And at least 2% of the Longhorn football players are stupid enough to drink and drive.

The Texas Longhorn football team is going through yet another bout of driving under the influence charges. Today, it's Marcus Davis, a couple of weeks ago, it was D.J. Munroe. Looks like we're back to 2007, when there was seemingly a weekly arrest of Longhorn footballers.

Thoughts on Rival QBs

Two great QBs in the Big 12 played their last regular season game this weekend, Colt McCoy and Zac Robinson. I would be remiss if I didn't say a few words about each:

Colt is a Texas QB that's tough not to love. I would have never thought from seeing this kid his freshman year he would be the winningest QB in NCAA history. Even though he's 3-1 against my Sooners, I've enjoyed seeing him grow as a leader on and off the field for the Longhorns. Colt's a great QB, fine ambassador for his university and a great witness for his Savior.

Zac Robinson, OSU's QB, has been fun to watch as well. Another kid that didn't look like much, but goes out there and gets the job done. Zac threw it well and ran it well, and was a heck of a competitor. His injury against Tech two weeks ago limited him in his last game today, and even as an opposing fan, I'm sad to see him go out on such a sour note, when he was clearly dinged up. Zac will finish his career as the leading passer and leader in total offense at Oklahoma State. He's always been fun to watch, and his elusiveness as a scrambler was fun to watch - when it was against someone else.

To each of you, I tip my cap, and wish you well in your future endeavors.

OSU vs Texas

Many folks out there are telling us that Oklahoma State really has a chance against Texas this week. After all, the game is being played in Stillwater! And it was really close last year! Let's take a step back and look at some things we call "facts" here at LandThieves:

a) Mack Brown is undefeated against Oklahoma State
b) During Brown's tenure at Texas, the Horns have outscored the Pokes 216-125 in 6 games in Austin.
c) During that same period, over 5 games, it's 219-117 in Stillwater. So according to my calculations, Texas wins by 15 points in Austin, but when the Pokes have home field advantage it's only 21 points?
d) Boone State has the 36 ranked scoring defense in the country. Texas has the 9th ranked scoring defense.
e) Texas has the #1 ranked scoring offense in the country. Oklahoma State has the 6th ranked scoring offense.
f) based upon won-loss record of current foes, the Pokes have played the 64th toughest schedule in the country. On the same criteria, the Horns have played the 40th toughest schedule.
g) according to Jeff Sagarin's computer rankings, Texas has played the 52nd toughest schedule, and Oklahoma State's schedule is 100th toughest.

So, in a nutshell, in this series during the past 11 years, 1) the home field advantage has meant nothing for the Pokes; 2) Texas is a better team statistically; 3) Texas has superior performance in spite of playing a tougher schedule to date.

All this analysis could go out the window considering the game is played by 20 year olds that occasionally get distracted with wine, women and schoolwork.

Sloppy Football

The AP story refers to the Texas-OU game as "sloppy" and Mack B referred to it as a defensive struggle like the SEC.

Let's compare a couple of marquee games:

Plays / Turnovers/ Pen Yds:
Game A: 131 / 6 / 173
Game B: 151 / 8 / 228
Game C: 131 / 4 / 108
Game D: 111 / 2 / 109

Game A is the classic Alabama / South Carolina game, B is the Horns / Sooners, and C is Razorbacks / Gators. Game D is the Florida / LSU game from Oct 10.

I won't dispute that the grade of SEC ball overall is superior to the Big 12 this year, I don't even think that's up for debate. What I do want to draw attention to is the number of plays in a game. the OU-Texas game had 15% higher number of plays. There were more opportunities for penalties and turnovers. Texas-OU had 40 more snaps in their game than Florida - LSU from the prior week.

I would propose that the pace of play in the OU-TX game led to a higher rate of penalties and turnovers, and that respect of the foes defense and control freakish nature of the coaches led to a slower pace in the SEC games referenced.

Was the game a little sloppy, you bet. I would say it kept me on the edge of my seat, but that's not true. I was standing the entire time.

More Postgame thoughts

Texas won a hard fought game. I tip my foam Sooner Schooner hat to them.


At the beginning of this year, I thought the Horns would win this game, as a result of a more experienced offensive line. I picked them to win in my Big 12 preview. Those picks were made prior to 1) realizing just how far the dropoff would be from last year's o-line to this years; 2) Jermaine Gresham getting hurt; 3) Sam Bradford getting hurt. If you would have told me at 800 am Sat morning that a) Bradford would get hurt in the first quarter; b) the Sooners would have five turnovers; c) have negative rushing yards, I probably wouldn't have even got in the car to go down to the Cotton Bowl.

Now, I'm going to digress into a couple of shoulda-woulda-couldas.

1. In the first quarter, Landry Jones throws a beautiful long pass to Cameron Kinney. Kinney jumps up over Curtis Brown, extends his arms - and the ball goes through his hands and hits him in the helmet. Incomplete pass, and Jimmy Stevens misses a 45 yard field goal into the wind. If he catches that pass, it's first and goal inside the give, and three plays later Jimmy could have make a much shorter field goal.
2. The Sooners DOMINATED the first quarter. And led 6-0 at the end of it. I thought the game was lost in the first quarter, when the Sooners had such an edge, but the edge didn't translate to points.
3. The hurry up offense needs to stop. The time of possession in this game was 34:32 Texas to 25:28 Sooners. In the first quarter, the Sooners had the ball 9:48 seconds to the Horns 5:12 seconds. The remaining 45 minutes of game time, the time of possession was 29:20 for Texas, and 15:40 seconds for the Sooners. As long as we can't: a) run the ball (3.9 ypc through, 66th in NCAA just ahead of Kent State, but behind Ohio), and b) convert 3rd downs (32 for 88 is 84th in Division 1-A), we need to not routinely snap the ball with 19 seconds left on the play clock.
4. The Baylor Bears have a run package where they take one of their defensive lineman and put him in at fullback. The Sooners need to do the same iwth Gerald McCoy on short yardage downs.
5. On Broyles TD catch and run, Brandon Caleb makes two crucial blocks that help Broyles make it all the way to the end zone.
6. The Sooner defense changed at half-time. They seemed to play mroe straight-up in the second half. At least from a lineup perspective. They seemed to not be moving around as much, and didn't seem to blitz as often. That probably was in part due to: a) half time adjustments and an effort to give Texas a different look; b) Longhorns snapping the ball more quickly and not allowing as much pre-snap movement; c) different looks given by the Horns.
7. The Sooner D did a great job of containing Shipley yesterday.
8. I realized in watching the game on the DVR that Brody Eldgridge played left guard yesterday. It's just another evidence of how bad the o-line is that our all-conference fullback and backup tightend has now played two different positions on the interior line thus far.
9. The Sooners were 0-5 on 3rd down conversions in the second half.
10. Keenan Clayton drops two different almost certain pick sixes during the second quarter.
    

Rope a Dope Works in 2nd quarter

I mentioned to a friend accompanying me to the game that the rope-a-dope was not a successful football strategy. However, in the second quarter, it did work.

Here are the Sooner possessions in the 2nd quarter:

1:16 TOP, 4 plays, 24 yards; fumble at the Texas 24
1:10 TOP, 4 plays, 10 yards; punt
1:25 TOP, 5 plays, 17 yards; punt
fumble on kickoff return
1:53 TOP, 3 plays, -13 yards; punt

That's 5 minutes and change of game time, 16 play, 38 yards and 2 turnovers.

Amazingly, the Sooners gave up only 3 points in this sequence, in spite of the Horns having five possessions, with an average starting point of their own 49.

On each of the five possession, the Horns crossed into Sooner territory, with the following results: one FG, one fumble, and a sack at the end of the half. Three of the possessions ended with the Horns being driven back to the 50 of on their own side of the field.

Folks, that's defense.

Book found in UT Bookstore

The End is Near

Got my Sports Illustrated in the mail today. Today is a big day in Poke history. Why, do you ask? It's the first time the Oklahoma State Cowboys made it on the cover of SI. Ever.

Let's hope it's a cover jinx.

To add to my misery, my ESPN The Magazine showed up today as well. Cover? My Little Pony.

I'll take the end of year covers over the beginning of year covers.

Big 12 Preview - Travis County Jail

It pains me to write this, but I have the Horns going 12-0 this year. The difference between the Horns and the Sooners for this year: returning offensive linemen and receivers, and Will Muschamp. My Little Pony is the likely Heisman winner this year. A couple of weeks ago, the DMN predicted the Big 12 South would be a 3 way tie again, with Boone State, OU and UT being the co-champions. It was an interesting story line, but not probable. If my prediction of returning o-line and receivers makes the difference in the Red River Rivalry game, then it means the Horns have to lose to someone else in Big 12 play. They’ve lost to the Pokes ONCE since the end of World War II, in 1997. The Horns fired their coach at the end of that year. Mack has lost two conference games in Austin in 11 seasons, so it’s unlikely to happen there. Looking at the Horns road games, they get Baylor in Waco (Mack is undefeated against Baylor); Oklahoma State (ditto); Missouri (ditto); and Texas A&M (Aggies are 2-3 at home against Mack). Unless Colt has another injury, I don’t see this happening. So if UT makes it through the murderous Louisiana-Monroe/Wyoming/UTEP non-conference schedule, wins out at home and beats OU, the table is set for another undefeated season. If not, look for a lot of crying in Austin.

Down goes Kindle

Sergio Kindle continued his relentless assault on the Texas highways and byways last week by crashing into an apartment building at 250 am. According to his attorney, whom Kindle familiarized himself with in 2007 after a DWI arrest, Kindle was texting at the time of the accident.

Kindle a) crashes his car; b) moves the car with the help of this passenger(s) (espn says multiple passengers, Dallas Morning News says one); c) abandoned the vehicle; d) went home and went to bed.

First of all, I think it's rude to send text messages to someone when you're with other people. I believe you should give the people you're with your undivided attention. Add the additional danger factor of doing it while driving, and it's downright dangerous.

Kindle hadn't been seen moving something that big and immediately abandoning it since he ran around Phil Loadholt ALL FREAKING DAY last October.

If Al Gore were a Longhorn

Great Asterisks in Longhorn History

1. October 7, 2000 - victory over Sooners*. If we wouldn't have looked ahead to Missouri, we would have taken the Sooners seriously.
2. December 1, 2001 - Texas beats Colorado for Big 12 Championship*. If only Mack would have started Major Applewhite.
3. December 29, 2000 - Texas beats Oregon in Holiday Bowl* (if the WRs could catch).
4. January 2, 1984 - Texas wins national championship* (if Craig Curry catches a punt)
5. October 1984 - Texas beats Oklahoma*. We just needed a couple more crappy calls to go our way, and we could have won.

Horns claim Big 12 conference championship

Texas claims 2008 title; then renounces it.

Longhorns to Abandon Football Program

UT Prez William "Austin" Powers said last week that the state's top 10% rule, if not changed, might lead to the universitry having to disband football. Apparently most of the Longhorn FB players were not in the top 10% of their high school academically.

Mack has been quick to respond, partnering with nearby cooking schools and work release programs to develop an alternate curricula for the Horns.

Mack's House

Grabbed this off of a former classmate's facebook page...

Coach Mack Brown, after living a full life, died. When he got to heaven, God showed him around. They came to a nice little house with a small Longhorn flag in the window."This house is yours for eternity, Mack," said God. "This is very special; Not everyone gets such a cozy house up here."Mack felt special, indeed, and walked up to his house.On his way up the porch, he noticed another house towering above the others.Just down the street. It was a multi-story mansion with a Crimson and Cream Sidewalk, a 50 foot tall flagpole with an enormous OU Sooner flag, and in Every window, he could see Sooner fans. Mack looked at God and said "God, I don't want to sound ungrateful, but I have a question. "God asked "So what do you want to know, Mack?""Well, why does Bob Stoops get a better house than me?"God chuckled, and said "Mack, that's not Bob's house, it's mine."