In our constant effort to keep up to date with the WWL, we here at LTP have opened up the coffers to hire our own legal analyst. We figured with the constant legal matters that confuse the everyday sports fan, we could assist our loyal reader(s) with our own legal analyst. Without further ado, LTP announces the hiring of former Chicago Bears and Texas Longhorn standout Cedric Benson. As a matter of introduction, we thought we'd do a little bit of a Q&A.
Joe Huff: Cedric, you don't have a law degree, what makes you qualified to be a legal analyst?
Cedric: I have six years of hands-on legal experience, including experience in marijuana possession, minor in possession, criminal trespassing, boating while intoxicated, resisting arrest and driving under the influence.
Joe: That's quite impressive.
Cedric: I'm two more citations away from a free tattoo on Sixth Street.
Joe: Good luck with that. Cedric, as we all know, you are a former Longhorn student. Why join forces with an Oklahoma Sooners fan's blog?
Cedric: That's an excellent question. If I may, I'd like to support that with three points. 1) There's a history of folks "jumping to the other side". The stadium in Austin is named after a Sooner alum; b) Many Texas high school players achieve success in Oklahoma; great names like Billy Sims, Tommie Harris, Adrian Peterson, Joe Washington, Quentin Griffin and Donta Hickson; 2) In four games against Oklahoma, I had 167 yards on 57 carries. I averaged 119 ypg game against everyone else in college football, and 42 ypg against the Sooners. As a result, I believe the Sooners already owned me. This just formalizes things.
Joe: Any projects you have in the hopper?
Cedric: First of all, we'll be looking into startling new developments in Testigate. Be sure to look for it soon.
Joe: We look forward to this partnership. And you might want to pour that out before you get back in the car.
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